that mythical creature we call Love

Conditions of Love: The Philosophy of Intimacy

By: John Armstrong

(Penguin Books)

Love is the most sought after of human emotions and the one that has eluded mankind since creation. In his book Conditions of Love: The philosophy of intimacy John Armstrong approaches the process of defining love delicately and with great care. For how does one even begin to ascribe meaning to such an ideal and diversely understood notion? His attempt at dissecting the many philosophies surrounding love and its effect on mankind is both perceptive and genuine. Armstrong’s ability to pack so many worldly views while peppering them with insightful examples from the literary and art worlds is nothing short of genius considering that the book itself is a short read shy of 200 pages.

Conditions of Love takes the reader’s hand and gracefully guides him through the history of love from its first appearance in Western literature in 1774 which Armstrong believes to be the ‘decisive moment’ in the history of ‘thinking’ about love. This moment came in the form of a short novel entitled The Sorrows of the Young Writer by Johann Wolfgang von Goethe. Although love as a literary theme was used before Goethe’s novel, his was the first to present love as a feeling. Sounds simple enough, natural even but according to Armstrong no book before this one had delved into the systematic account of what it actually FEELS like to be in love. The reader is then whisked into the notions of love provided by Plato and Aristotle and is introduced to some of the greatest ideas of intimacy as it pondered by these vast minds.

In an attempt to give an all-encompassing idea of love Armstrong also pits love against the sciences and evaluates what both biology and psychology have to offer about this emotion. Its meaning is looked for in religion as well for the Christian faith decrees that there is no higher or more pristine love than that of one’s love for his creator. One cannot help but feel that Armstrong's work channels Anne Carson's book Eros the Bittersweet (if you have not read it, you should) in which the idea of Eros or love is explored in both classical philosophy and literature albeit from a more feminine perspective it makes for a great comparison read because unlike Armstrong who begins his book with Goethe, Carson begins her's with Sappho. 

Armstrong’s book does not claim to have the answer to the meaning of love and that is what makes it a refreshing read. You will probably come out the other end asking more questions than when you started and that is a good thing. The examples given by Armstrong make for great supplementary reading, I myself had to look up some of the paintings that are mentioned in the book in order to get a more tangible sense of the love being portrayed. The purpose of books like this one is to heighten one’s curiosity and open one’s mind to alternative ideas about what we believe we know all too well.

We have all fallen in love once, or maybe thought we had, and that experience allows us to believe that we understand what love is about. Whether it was an insecurity or our heightened imagination that has pushed us towards one person and not the other, whether it was loneliness or simply fate we can all agree that love comes to us as an external and uncontrollable emotion that boggles the mind  and keeps us wondering. Conditions of Love will challenge all that you know and will call you out on the ideas you thought defined love leaving you astounded at what you have missed.

This is a short read yes, but it is a deep one that will keep you coming back for more.